Fellatio, blow jobs, going downtown, giving head-we blush a bit just printing the words. Just ask Holly,* a 28-year-old sales rep from Houston, about the experience she now refers to as "the incident." Things started out fine: She'd met John, a cute financial broker, on and had been on two low-key dates. At the end of date number three, they went home together. A few minutes into making out, recalls Holly, "He tells me, You're such a good kisser.
I can only imagine what else you can do with your mouth.'" She was so taken aback that she started laughing: Her halter top and heels littered his floor, but he expected her to give him oral? "That's a boyfriend privilege, and you're not my boyfriend," she replied. Undeterred, John asked a second time Holly said no. He walked her to her car, and she never heard from him again. John's assumption that he'd get a BJ on the third date? You could call it (in a sort of Seinfeld-ian way) the new BJE, or blow job expectation. And it exists: In an Australian survey, 50 percent of women ages 16 to 25 reported that they'd been pressured to give oral sex, and a recent Playboy/Harris Interactive online survey revealed that 23 percent of men wouldn't even date someone if she refused to give it. Remember the scene in Bridesmaids in which Jon Hamm ribs Kristen Wiig for not giving him a "lap nap"? Or in Knocked Up, when Katherine Heigl asks Seth Rogen what he would want on their second date? "BJ," he says. Another reason for our casual view of oral sex? Sex education trends since the 1990s, says Sonia Borg, Ph.D., a clinical sexologist and author of Oral Sex He'll Never Forget. High schoolers have been taught that intercourse can lead to sexually transmitted infections-but not necessarily that oral sex may too (which it can see "Wait" on next page). Use family filters of your operating systems and/or browsers Other steps you can take to protect your children are: More information about the RTA Label and compatible services can be found here. When intercourse is off the table, oral sex can become a goal.
So "men are like, It's safe, you like me, let's do this,'" Borg says. PORN, PORN, PORN! Let's not forget that the digital era has led to the rise of easy-access adult movies, in which blow jobs are often Act I, Scene I.